Why does an expat girl need an expat friend?

- Is everything ok? Why are you not answering your phone? - Maurice asks a bit worried.

- I’m sorry, I was just cycling when you called. I cannot use this phone when I’m wearing hand gloves [ah, the downside of a smartphone]. Plus I was already very close from home. I thought I’ll call you back.

- You were just coming back home? Why so late… I thought you were supposed to meet with girls for lunch at 13.00? - he sounds surprised

- Well I did… It just took a bit longer. You know we always tend to gossip for long. And we haven’t seen each other for sooo long!

The WastefulWives Club is reunited! God I love these lunch meetings. They always take the whole afternoon, we often discover new, cute places in our city and we can gossip nonstop for few hours and share stories called “I’m never gonna understand these Dutch…[honestly, who can??]”. It’s still nothing comparing to going for lunch with my friend Lidia (we always somehow ended up at some bar drinking vodka on the rocks somewhat after midnight), but these were different times. Student times. Now the Wasteful Wives have husbands/children/cats to feed. Nevertheless, when we meet, for these few hours nothing else matters.

We all know, that a woman need her girlfriends same as she needs an oxygen. Love is great, carrier’s amazing, motherhood… well, apparently some people enjoy it ;) You can have it all, but at some point this day is going to come, when you’re gonna want to kill everyone around you. And at this day only a good, honest girl-talk can save you. Especially if you live abroad.

If someone would ask me how do I remember my first months as an expat, I would say: long. Sure everything was new and fresh and fascinating (or terrifying). There was a lot to discover, a lot to learn and accept. But those days were quite lonely. Maurice was working a lot and coming home late (well he still is, but now I’m also busy). Me on the other hand… I was trying so much to fill my days with anything. I was desperately needing a friend. Someone like me, who has moved here and had similar hopes, worries and emotions as I did. When I finally met my Expat girls I was relived. Than at school I met more girls, who became my best friends in this country. I could finally feel like home. I had someone to go out for coffee, to meet. Someone who knew exactly what it feels like to move abroad for love.

Human is a herding animal and he needs to feel he belongs somewhere. Women need it even more. Being an immigrant who doesn’t speak the language yet kind of makes you stand out from the rest of the society. You can try to integrate 24/7  and you’re still gonna be different. And you’re gonna have these thought like “Why are they being so weird? Is this nation sane? Or… am I still sane?”. This is when your friends step in. A lost and confused girl can exchange their observations, compare the analyses and draw conclusions together: she’s not the only one that’s crazy. There’s more of us – the incoming paranoids or it’s the Dutch nation that’s not exactly normal ;) And there are hundreds  of such a social scientific topics to discuss: the Dutch savoir-vivre, struggling with learning the language and “the hate stage”, the healthcare system, the laid-back fashion and style (and why it’s pointless to even style your hair), relations with your in-laws (and why even if they are awesome, you don’t want to spend with them significantly more time than hanging on a phone or skype with your mom)… These conversations help you to feel that you really belong somewhere and realise that you’re not alone with these confusing feelings and ambivalent emotions. And if there’s more people like you, it means your mental health is still fine. So live long girlfriends and the relaxing time spent with them!

Polish-Dutch Easter

- What's happening here? - asks and older Dutch woman observing a parking lot getting filled with cars with polish registration numbers  and a crowd of people with little baskets walking in the direction of a church.

- It's a Polish invasion! - jokes Alex, Agnes husband.

On a Saturday afternoon, suddenly and out of nowhere, a little Poland materialized in a center of Arnhem, close to St. Martin's church. We were also there, proudly holding our little baskets. A Polish congragation did organise traditional food blessing, run by a cheerful prist, who joked a lot and with a huge smile on his face sprinkled the crowd and the baskets with holy water. All the seats were takes and the churched filled with Poles really fast. It's such a extraordinary and a bit surrealistic feeling to see all these fellow-courtymen gathering and uniting around our little tradition, though we're all far away from our fatherland. It must be really surprising and confusing view for the Dutch, who don't have same tradition.  

Our Easter basket with blessed food :)

Spending my very first Easter away from my home and family I decided to introduce my Dutch side of the family to some Polish traditions. We invited my father-in-law and Maurice's sister with her boyfriends to join us at an Easter breakfast. I planned everything well, but there were still few little problems. On a night from Saturday to Sanday we changed our clocks into summer time. As I expected our guests forgot about this change and they all came one hour later than planned. We should actually call it than an Easter brunch :D Neverthless it doesn't really matter, because it's not the hour that is important, but the people who gather around the table and a nice, family ambience.

Our table farm: lamb, chicks and... a butter hen ;)

We had everything that is expected according to the tradition: colored eggs, organic bread, very carefully selected by myself two sorts of ham, mini sausages, horseraddish, cockooflower, veggie salad from my mom's recipe, little lemon-poppy seeds cake and a Dutch accent: cheese, cucumber, tomato and fruit salad, made by Maus earlier that morning. First I told everyone (in Dutch! damn I'm good) in short about the tradition and few customs and than we all shared an already bit dry bread and the rest of the stuff from the basket. Tapping the eggs appeared to be a lot of fun for them and they did it more enthusisticly than I even expected ;) But than, who doesn't like to "attack" an egg of companion?

After breakfast there was still some coffee and mon chou cheesecake and a long conversation. My father-in-law did like the whole idea so much, he declared, that from now on he wants to spend the Easter this way. Every year! 

Holy Molly... a story about searching for a basket

We're spending Easter this year in the Netherlands, because of my exams. I may not be very religious, but some of my traditions I'm not planning to give up. Maurice as a cultural barbarian is not going to suppot me in my actions, but as long as I promise not to drag him with my to church, he's also not gonna try to discourage me. As long as he can stay relatively passive, he's fine with it ;)

The house is clean, whether I planned it or not. I'm not a big fun of polish tradition of huge pre-Easter cleaning including polishing bathroom tiles one after another or washing windows with outdoor temperature close to 0 Celsius degrees. However after two weeks of studying and not paying much attention to the cleanlinness in our hen-house, the space was asking for detergents and hoover. Poor naive woman.. you were really hoping that your man would do something about it himself? Keep dreaming. 

I decided to have a piece of my traditions in here, so I invited my father-in-law and sister-in-law for a traditional polish Easter breakfast. Than suddenly a crazy thought came through my mind. How about... bless the food? It's a big part of Polish traditions, that on Saturday we take our food (like eggs, ham, bread, sausages, salt and horseraddish) to church and bless it with holy water. Good idea! But where? How? Why? Is there any church in our neighborhood, where they bless food? There's plenty of churches around (most of the protestant however), but Dutch people don't know this tradition! We need to find a Polish congregation. Luckily Agnes is also staying in the Windmill-country for Easter with her family and she had the same crazy idea. She's a bit more experienced and better informed, so she knew where and when. We're going on Saturday to Arnhem! There's only one problem left... a basket. 

Where the hell am I supposed to find a right wicker basket for święconka (food for blessing)?! There's a lot of baskets in the shops, but they seem all wrong. They are rather for planting flowers in a garden/balcony or for keeping all possible crap in an organised and decorative way in a house. Most of all... they don't have a holder! Have you ever seen a basket with święconka without a holder? Ever! I ran crazy through all possible shops in a center, that may have the needed stuff. Suddenly... oh hell yes! I found it! Perfect size, with a holder. So what it has a fabric tag with "Garden" on it and plastic foil inside... both can be easly removed. Or covered with a big napkin. And decorated with some twigs with "kittens" (how do you call this stuff on a pic above in english?). It's gonna be perfect! After all we don't have much choice. You gotta like what you have, if you don't have what you like. 

The last day of school

A year ago in April I started the learning the dutch language for serious. A year after I finished my studies I was about to go back to school like as a freshman. Learning the basics of the language, how to pronouce some letters, listening to funny, childish songs and doing a lot of homework. It was an amazing period. I learned a lot not only about dutch language, but also about the culture and tradtions of the citizens of the Netherlands and many countries where other students were from. I met so many nice and interesting people. With some of them I got good friends. My life here in the Netherlands would not be the same anymore without their presence.

The wasteful wives club ;)

However everything has its end and so did the language course. Our last lesson was fun and so relaxed. Instead of doing another grammar exercises, writing mini-essays or analizing our common mistakes, our amazing teacher prepared for us... a cookie quiz! 

We were divided into three groups. Each group got a set of typically dutch cookies and candies and we had to connect the sweets with right names and descriptions. Of course sometimes it required some proof testing! Gotta say I didn't have any problems with this ;) Maurice was later joking that a glutton like me should be a separate one-person group. 

The next task was to advertise the cookies by every group. And that's when the real fun started. To win the contest we were coming up with sometimes ridiculous and hillarious ideas and arguments. Everyone was laughing and joking. It did not look like a lesson at all. Rather like a meeting of good friends. 

Our group with two great teachers in front and our only guy ;) 

 Now there're only exams left and than... keep intergrating with this tiny, funny country and its citizens :)

Something to read

Lately it was again quite laud about Polish immigrants in the dutch media. Newspapers were writting about it, different websites on internet, they were talking about it in a radio. Luckily it was nothing negative (as it often happens). Even more, it was very possitive. Polish immigration in the Netherlands finally has its own magazine!

I'm writting about it only now, almost two weeks later, because for the first week I was trying to buy the newspaper personally. Unfortunately it was harder than I expected. There are only few distribution points in my area and they all are quite far away. And of course I don't have a car. I'm guessing I wouldn't have this problem at all if I'd live somewhere in Randstad, but I don't. Instead I live in this "far away land" called the eastern part of the Netherlands. Luckily there's an option for people like me, to order online your own copy of "poPolsku" (the titel means "in polish"). I paid with my phone and the package was delivered few days later by the post. Though I paid for the delivery more than for the magazine itself, it's still nothing, since the price of "poPolsku" is... attention attention, the whole 1 euro! ;)

Holding the first issue of biweekly newspaper in my hands I was planning to go through it quickly, to check what's inside and than come back to the articles I'm gonna find interesting. My plan of course didn't work out. I read it all immidiately. So what can I say about it... Why the hell didn't you start with publishing it a year ago, when I just moved to this country?! It would be sooo handy and helpful back than. Of course it still is now and I really enjoyed reading advices about moving here, starting career (it's still waiting for me, so the article was just in time), dutch healthcare system or learning the dutch language (mini lesson in every issue!). While I was reading I was comparing the tips they gave, to my own experience. Seems like some of the things went faster and smoother for me. Furthermore I found some cool interesting things in the magazine, like tips on places worth to visit (both on my list), sport, history of Holland, cuisine and typical standards like movie, book, music, wives gossip and hints.

In general I'm very possitive about it. The founders of "poPolsku" called it "a biweekly magazine for modern Poles in the Netherlands". As I see myself as quite modern Polish woman, I'd say they did a good job and satisfied the expectations of the target group. I only couldn't fully agree with a column called "the Poles and the Dutch... what are the differences and similarities between us?". For me the informations were a bit too sketchy and based on stereotypes, but it's only my own, personal opinion.

Now for all of you who might be interested in this magazine, but doesn't live in Holland or doesn't speak polish, I have a good news. Most of the articles (and even more) you can easily find on the website popolsku.nl both in polish and dutch language version. So Ladies and Gentelmen - I recommend! Let's read.

The art of cycling on a snow

"Are we cycling today to school?!" - said a text message I got this morning from my new bicycle buddy.
"Of course we are! Why, are you scared? We're from Poland, we're not afraid of snow!" - I immidiately answered.

It's winter again in the Netherlands. During one night a fluffy, white down covered the whole world and I really hope it's gonna stay for a bit longer this time. Last month it disapeared within two days. Sometimes I have a feeling, that Dutch people are terribly afriad of the snow. There's barely 5 centimeters of it on a ground and the whole country is already standing still. Traffic jams, delayed trains, many people decided to stay home and with their boss permission work from there. I'm not gonna even mention about the airports. Ok, to be honest it was a bit more of the snow in the west part of Holland... 15 cm.

Winter or not - I have to go to school. At least I should. If the Dutch can cycle throughout the whole year, we can't be different (meaning worse)! Besides how often do you have a chance to cycle through a snowdrift? Ok, maybe I went to far with that snowdrift... on a snow. You just have to remember about few golden rules of cycling in this winter aura and than it's a piece of cake. As a conscientious rapporteur I tested those rules for you guys (meaning I tried to break them). I didn't break any bone, didn't get hurt and my amazing cat agilityand reflex saved me from falling on my ass. However I did a spectacular drift.

That's more less how small roads look like... white :)

I'm already answering you curious questions: no, my bike doesn't have any kind of winter tires. I don't even know a single person, who would have those and this idea seems grotesque. One of my dear readers have sent me once a link to a website with special winter bicycles... I didn't know if I should be amazed, excited or terrified. Neverthless I fell of the chair. Speaking of winter tires, they are not very popular in the Netherlands (I mean the car tires now). That might be one of the explanations why there are always such a long traffic jams in winter. However the truth is, that is the road service is reacting on time, the highways, main streets (and popular bicycle lanes) are black. After all they are not saving on salt (used on the roads to melt the snow and ice). White road you can find only in some villages or inside the residential areas. 

Let's now come to the point. How to cycle on a snow? What shall you do or not? If you're gonna stay focused and careful enough, it's actually really fun! So my dear Readers, I present you...

GOLDER RULES OF CYCLING ON A SNOW AND ICE:

1. Watch out for the speed. In winter it's better to ride a bit slower and cautious for a very simple reason... breaking on snow/ice is not easy. 
2. Keep you leg (or hand) out of the breaks. Hard and sudden breaking is almost a guarantee of slipping and eventually falling of the bike. If you need to stop fast use you shoes for breaking and jump of the bike (unless you have very long legs... I don't).
3. Stay away from the snowdrifts. If you're already riding in a rut on a snow, go along it and keep the balance. If you're gonna try to cross it, you bicycle may fall. 
4. Be especially cautious and slow on the corners and curves covered with snow/ice. I hope I don't have to explain why ;) That's exactly where I did my bicycle drift, so on a sharp turn I recommend a version "on the foot" or taking a wide berth. 
5. I you already have to fall, please kindly head into the closest snowdrift and don't make any obstacle on the lane. Don't make other bicyclists life harder than it has to be ;)
6. And the last: GOOD LUCK!

How do the Dutch protect themselves from the flood?

We're sitting in my father-in-law's car. He took me and my parents, who were're just visiting us, for a little sightseeing trip. Theoreticaly I'm used to the Dutch people's way of driving on a dikes, but it doen't mean I feel fine or comfortable with it. I'm looking on a backseat, checking how my parents are doing. My mom is holding tightly her bag with one hand and the door of the car with another. My dad seems to be cool, but I can see how he's checking the edge of the road. I guess he's also doesn't feel very comfortable with the idea that the edge of the road is dangerously close to a steep slope of the dike. Did his hair just stand straight? Oh, of course... we're getting close to few curves and my father-in-law doesn't seem like even thinking about slowing down. He barely slows down when he's passing other cars on this narrow road. If I didn't know him, I'd think he's crazy.

For the Dutch dikes are nothing extraordinary (well of course except the fact, they are a reason to be proud of). You can find them almost everywhere, along any river or shore... Along the dikes on the top of them there are normal roads or bicycle-walking lanes. A dike in the Netherlands is something perfectly normal, a typical part of the landscape and... actually really needed. 

Christmas this year was quite warm and rainy. The efects you can still find in few spots

A big part of the dutch territory is laying below sea level, plus there's a very dense network of rivers. There's a huge pressure on finding and improving methods, that would protect the land from floods. Especially after the huge flood from 1953, new projects and researches came to life. I live in Holland for only one year (and few months), but I've already seen few times how important the dikes are. Every longer period of heavy rain (and we really complain on the weather often here), melting snow on spring (or in January/February... sure, why not?) even if we're talking about snow in Germany or France that supplies the waters of Rhine... all of this is increasing the water level.

Basicly we have two types of dikes: the summer one (zomerdijk) and the winter one (winterdijk). As you can guess, the winter one is much higher and is the main barrier from the high water. Between these two, there's a zone called uiterwaard. It's getting often flooded. Uiterwaard can be wide or not, but it's most of the time a kind of meadow, where horses and cows graze. After all what else can you do with a terrain that is regularly under water. 

Zomerdijk separating the river Waal from a recently flooded uiterwaard

That's how a dike is built. Source: wikipedia

In summer and spring it's a really nice place for a stroll: green, quiet, with a river passing by... so idyllic. The dike itself can be very picturesque and an ultradutch part of the landscape. It's perfect for walking, jogging and cycling. When the weather is nice you'll meet there many people doing exactly the same as you do. Enjoying. What surprised me last year during my first mini trip along the dike was that everyone was so friendly and smiling and greeting everyone no matter if you know each other or not. There's only one downside of the dikes... it's always so freaking windy! And sometimes you have to watch out for crazy Dutch drivers ;)

A train trip to Poland

I'm laying covered with a warm blanket, staring at the window. It's peacefully quiet and I can hear only steady clatter of the wheels is putting me to sleep. Behind the window smaller and bigger towns are flashing with their lights in the darkness. We're passing them so fast. Now we have just reached some big light splash. The train is stopping at the station and I can hear someone shouting something in German. It's Koln and it's half past one. There's still a whole-night journey ahead of us. 

source: wikipedia

This year we decided to go for Christmas to Poland by... train. The prices of plane tickets were already enormous (however if we'd add the prices of train tickets from Warsow to Cracow and back, I guess we wouldn't save much), but most of all we couldn't find a right date for the fly. The choice was not big and we were very picky. That's why I decided to try this traditional, a bit nostalgic way of transportation. After all why not to try sometimes something different. A little adventure trip ;) Traveling by train brings me memories from my childhood. When you're preparing to this kind of journey, you know it's gonna take long, so you're not in a rush. You allow yourself to relax and let the time pass by just like the landscapes behind the window.  There's something romantic about the trains. Like going back in time. When the other passengers are falling asleep, you can clear your mind, listen to the clatter of the wheels and watch the views quickly passing by. A kind of a night kaleidoscope. I guess that without some dose of sensibility traveling by train must be very uphill and unconvenient. For me it's a bit more than just a means of transport. 

We took our train in Arnhem. Two couches in a 6 pax. We shared our compartment with a polish student studing economics in Amsterdam, a portly man, who spent most of the time in some other part of the train and slept only few hours on his place snoring from time to time; and a polish mother with two little twin girls with an identity disorder (apparently one of the girls was strongly convinced that she's a dog, so she was barking, jumping on her bed and baying at the moon or a laptop for instance). Maurice started talking a joking with the girls just when we got in the train, so they went a bit too energetic and unstoppable and didn't want to go to sleep driving their mother mad. I didn't know if I should laugh (the brilliant and irrational dialogues of three-year old and her mom) or pray so the girl would fall asleep (I couldn't focus and read). Luckily in some point the got tired and collapsed and slept the whole night quiet and nicely.

I had an impression that the whole train or at least our car was very polish. From all the directions, from behind the wall, from the corridor, from the platforms all I could hear was polish. Even a conductor was Polish. And one poor Maurice in a middle of this polish cloud trying to make some mini interviews asking everyone "Do you like living in the Netherlands?". In Warsow we were half an hour before the time. Thanks to that would still managed to catch an earlier train to Cracow. I knew it not to book the tickets online... somehow I don't trust polish railways, especially not in winter and christmas season. Another few-hour ride. Our car was kind a "internationalized", tho except for Maurice we were all Poles. Many of these people were living/working/studying somewhere abroad in Europe and now we were all coming home for Christmas. Nice conversations and pleasant warmth. They clearly don't try to save on heating in polish trains. For me it's great, i'm a very warm-liking creature, but for Maurice... He was almost melting all the way. 

In Cracow we were perfectly in time. I gotta say I was impressed. I expected at least few-minute delay. What a surprise. Probably because there was barely any snow. Now we only had to take the last train, the last part of our trip and slowly roll to our last station, where my dad was already waiting in a car to pick us up. That how we got to Poland for Christmas. Four trains, three interchange and 21 hours of travel. A bit tired and hungry, but happy and satisfied with our trip we got it safe home.

Dutchman's Anatomy: "getting friends" age limit

- My friend asked me today if we'd like to go this weekend with her and her husband for a concert in Amsterdam.
- Sounds fun. If you want to go, than tell her we're in - answerd Maurice pleased with my increasing social life.

Two days later.

- You know, there's a little change of the plans. They got an idea to go for some party after the concert. They've also already booked a hotel for all of us, so we could go to sleep after the party and than go home the next day fresh and relaxed - I informed calmly, but with a bit of excitement and anxiety in my voice.
- Whaaat? Do you know how much is it gonna cost? - Maurice started his protest.
- Relax, they said we should not worry about the money. It's on them.
- Yeah, but this way we have already Saturday AND Sunday planned...
- Soo? Did you have any other plans for Sunday?
No, but... I don't even have time for my own friends, who I haven't seen for a long time and now you want me to spend the whole weekend with YOUR friends!

And here's the problem... This is what I was afraid of when I say "anxiety". This whole protest is not about Maus spending time with my friends. He actually really likes them.The problem is, he doesn't want his friends to see it as some kind of betrayal! That's exactly what it is... the Dutch loyalty is strong, but it has an age limit.

My expat girls once complaind, that it's not easy to become friends with Dutch people. Sometimes it's actually even hard to meet new people. The help comes from another expat who's in a relationship with a Dutch and who tries to mix both groups of friends from time to time. Together with Anna we noticed a very specific thing when it comes to our Dutch partners  and their friendships. Both of them have a lot of friends. They have a lasting gang, where everyone knows eachother since ages. So where's the problem? They met all of their friends when they were still children, at school, a bit less during studies. They don't keep any personal, private contact with their colleagues. Well... not more then needed minimum. And where are the new friends? They don't exist! There's no place left for any new friendships for a long time.

So let me see this clear... what's with this whole famous dutch openness? Is it just a lie? Noo, not at all. They are very open and friendly. It doesn't mean you cannot get any contact with them. They would actually happily talk to you, go crazy at a party, drink hectoliters of beer in tiny glasses and would make you feel very welcome. However (!!) it doesn't mean they would same happily go out or meet again. And this openness and friendly attitude is definitely not some kind of mask or so. No... Their agendas are simply already too full to squeeze you in! 

- You know what, I talked about it lately with Simon - tells Maurice - We both come to the conclusion, that all of our private contacts come from before we turned 25. After than we didn't meet anyone, we would get friends with. We simply don't have time for this anymore!

The name issue

I'm getting to the conclusion that if one day I'll make a decision about applying for a double nationality, for the dutch passport I will change my name into something more dutch or at least an english version of my name. Why? Because "Justyna" seems to be impossible for the Dutch!

I always thought my name was not too complicated, weird, too original or whatsoever. Actually I thought it was quite easy and relatively international. And than I came to Holland. Surprisingly it appeart to be very confusing for the Dutch people and giving them sometimes a hard time. Most of the time they spell it with "i" instead of "y", which I still can understand. At my gym they thought out of the box and wrote it starting with "y"... Yustina. This is exactly why I always try to spell it very clear and controll what they are writing, or in more formal situations I just give them my passport, so they can copy a letter after a letter. 

However our developer showed a real creativity. When we got the keys to our henhouse, Maurice told how we want our names on a nameplate by the front door. He even wrote it down for them. Today, about 5 months after we moved, I happily discovered that the nameplates are finally here! (They clearly did not hurry). But wait a minute... a closer look and...

Justijna?! What the hell?! They really made my name very Dutch... No words. Is it really that complicated?

To all those who may wonder why would I want a double nationality: no, I'm not ashamed of my Polish nationality and also no, I don't feel the need to "westernize" myself. I also don't care about voting right (I'm not interested in politics and voting is for me as important as a potato peeler for a dog). The answer is very simple: a dutch passport and lack of visa requirements to many countries which unfortunately still expect visa from Polish citizen. 

The first year

It's the whole year since I moved abroad! Exactly 366 days since I packed my life into a big backpack and a suitcase and brought it all to Nijmegen to make the first steps in our Neverland. It was a busy year and I learned a lot. Here are some of my discoveries:

10 THINGS I DIDN'T KNOW A YEAR AGO:

1. The Netherlands opened my eyes for all delicious kinds of food. I always knew I'd love asian food, but in Poland didn't have many opportunities to really try it. Here I can choose as much as I want: thai, chinese, indonesian, japanese, indian, surinamese (I know it's not Asia, but South America ;P) Even more, the surprising mixes of different tastes that may seem weird in a first place, happen to be delicious! Who would ever expect that fries with mayonese and peanut butter can be so good and that indian lime pickles are gonna steal my heart and soul. 





Sinfully yummy India Burger with cheese, limp pickles and yoghurt-koliander sauce 

2. Anything can be used to make a sandwich... even fresh strawberries on bread, though it sounds weird indeed. And chocolate sprinkles are great not only for cake and dessert decoration. It can be an interesting choice for a sweet breakfast ;)
3. The weather in Holland is not so great, so to protect yourself from the rain, wind and cold, any methods are welcome. One morning somewhere in June you're suddenly discovering that leather boots are good to wear all-year-around. Not only in winter. And the cool thing is, nobody is gonna look weird at you, 'cause here it's completly normal.





4. You can often see happy, smiling people in DIY store's commercials. In these commercials it seems like renovating your house is such a joy, like you're on your second honeymoon. The worst thing is: I believed in that stuff! Untill I did it myself. There's no such a thing as happy painting/renovating. If you think the other way it means you have never tried it yourself or your a weirdo ;P
5. Santa Claus does not live on a North Pole, nor in Lapland. He's not travelling with a sleigh and flying reindeers and there are no elfs working in his toys factory. It's the little black boys working there! And nowhere else than in Spain, where they come from with Santa on the 5th of December on a steamship. But the fact that the Spanish Santa has the black "helpers" does not mean he's a racist! God forbid! 





Source

6. Speaking of winter... You would think, that if I come from Poland, where the winter is colder and longer I wouldn't have any problems with the dutch one, right? Wrong! I'm not really used to the neverending wind and a higher humidity and the last winter in Holland was a real humiliation, since I had to wear way more layers than the average Dutchman. My super-warm-always-working wool handgloves did not go well with the dutch conditions. Why? Because when I was cycling the cold wind went through them.
7. I grew up in a village, so no goat, sheep or chicken should be an extraordinary thing for me. However in my village you wouldn't find many farm animals. Barely any to be honest. Now, thanks to the popular childrens farms, though I'm living in quite a big city I'm seeing goats way more often than during my whole childhood in the countryside. Where's the logic...
8. Do you like commercial breaks during watching a movie in TV? I don't. That's why I like going to the cinema. But surprise: in dutch cinemas that have a break in the middle of the movie! Why? To go for a smoke or pee. Or preferably to buy some more sweet popcorn.  
9. A bicycle is a great invention. Multifunctional. I haven't learned so much about all the possibilities and ways to use this vehicle in my entire life, as I did during last year. Soon I'm gonna share this knowledge with you in a post titled "5 secrets of the cyclist".





10. At the end a cheering fact: if you're an emigrant, it doesn't matter where do you come from or where do you live... You're not alone with you fears, worries and doubts. Everytime we talk about this in a group and someone shares her fears, the rest is always agreeing with her "I was going to say the exactly same thing!"

It's not too bad

After the first week of school I got a bit relaxed. The level is indeed very high and it means a lot of studying for me, but (!) at least I don't feel during the lessons like an idiot. You can have an impression, that everyone is speaking quite decent Dutch and they have much bigger vocabulary than me. Ok, that is definitely true. On a way it's good for me, since speaking and listening test was the hardest for me in july during my exam. I just have to focus on learning new words and work hard. However I feel quite confident in school. Where does it come from? The grammar. After these few lessons I already noticed I have way less problems with grammar, that the others. Probably it's an effect of taking the beginners course before, which most of our class didn't have. The started already with the higher level. The things that the teachers were explaining on a lesson, we did very carefully before the summer. That's my reason to be proud.

Of course it doesn't mean I can or am going to be lazy now. Definitely not! The next few months I'm gonna be improving my Dutch and learning to new words intensively. And you my dear readers are gonna be treated to my new language discoveries! Are you happy already?

Till the end of this week we're planning to finish our hen-house study room, so I'd have a perfect, quiet place to study and maybe write as well. The cosmetic changes of our appartement got lately the higher priority, since next week we are expecting a Very Important Guests. I already cannot wait and make the whole plan in my head of what i'm gonna show them and where I'm gonna take them. And how to make their stay the most possibly comfortable. 

Back to school

I woke up early morning, still a bit sleepy but at the same time excited I ran to the bathroom. I washed myself quickly, ate a yummy breakfast made specially for me and dressed well ironed cloths, which I prepared the day before. I packed new, still empty notebooks, colorful pens, pencils, rubber and lunch in my backpack and went to school. It was September again and I was just starting another semester. That was about 15 years ago. Do you still remember this excitement while collecting need books, notebooks and all these cool tools? God, what an emotions! 

That was than. And how about now? Today my lessons startd again, so I got up earlier that normally, made some sandwiches for Maurice and cereals for myself. That's my new resolution: on the school days I'll be getting up same time as Maus (he wakes me up anyway, so what's the difference) and preparing breakfast for both of us. This way he's gonna save time and me... I'm gonna be ready on time. No rush, no being late, no empty stomach.

I didn't have any pencil-case today (the colorful pens were still in a bag though!), the notebook was a "used" one already... Only the books I got at school were new. And the class was new. Except the two friends from the previous course, all the rest was new. New faces, new names, new countries... mosty Middle-East countries. And of course new challanges! I gotta say, I got quite stressed after the first lesson. The level is of course higher this time and you can deffiniately notice that. Everyone is already speaking quite a reasonable Dutch. And me... well, after the holiday break I feel I'm suddenly a bit behind! And I clearly don't like it. I already know, I'm gonna have to work harder and study more this time. Not to waste more time, I wish you all a good start of the new week and I'm going back to do my homework!

A panic attack

- I'm 27 years old! I should be already doing some career, getting important experience, reaching new goals, not be just sitting on a bench and waiting for my turn to start finally! I want to start already now, do things, not just keep waiting and waiting! - I was moaning in a middle of a night, sitting on a sofa and massaging my knee. Maurice was totally confused, where did this whole panic attack suddenly came from, but he was   also trying to cheer me up. Barely a quarter of an hour ago we were sitting with a friend in our favorite bar laughing and disscussing about some silly stuff. And now, suddenly I'm in this deep depresion state.

I guess many expats in my age knows exactly what I'm talking about and how it feels. This kind of helplesness when you're in a new country, where people are speaking a language you don't understand and even locals in your age are facing difficulties with finding a job. You've been studing for some years and strongly believing, that after the graduation you'll smoothly start another chapter in your life. The adult life. And somehow it doesn't work like that. Instead of getting on a runway, you end up in a hangar. And you start EVERYTHING from the beginning. Learning the language, the culture, finding out your way in a city and realising how does the whole country and society works. I know I'm not the only one, who has this worries, wondering how my life is gonna look like in this country. Lately I was talking about it with a colleague from my language course and we were laughing "Oh thank God, you have the same thoughts! So I did not go crazy yet... it's normal to feel this way".

Starting your life in another country can be very exciting. I feel sometimes like a five-year exploring the whole new world. A tiny little human, who doesn't understand yet everything that's happening around, but all of that seems to be so fascinating and inspiring. A motivation comes from all directions and I'm absorb all the news like a sponge. But there are also days, moments, when suddenly, out of nowhere I'm getting scared and panic. Especially when I'm worried about my healthy knee (the other was got damaged few years ago in an accident) cause it hurt for half a day, plus I'm quite drunk after few strong cuba libre... well here's a perfect recipe for a panic attack. Luckly today nothing hurts anymore, surprisingly there's no hangover and the panic is gone. Only Maurice is still a bit worried.

I declare war

Come on, it can't be like that! You cannot attack a defenceless person with such a rain!... And already early in a morning?! I got completly soaked today twice and after I bought a new umbrella (a small one, that I can put in my bag, not the huge beast like Maurice once got)... it stped raining. How can you live like that?

Some could say I asked for it, if I went on a bike in such a rain, but I didn't have much choice. Skipping a lesson because of bad weather is a very lame excuse in a country where it rains for half of summer. Not even mentioning the other seasons. I tryied to protect myself in all possible way, but it didn't work. My jacket is just too short and half of my long sweater got wet, my leggins (I already learned a lesson on Monday, that jeans won't work with this weather... they dry too long). Only my hair stayed quite dry, cause I managed to hide them under a bonnet. Even my suede boots did not survive the water resistance test, though I thought that if you're cycling - meaning: your feet don't touch the ground and you won't step in a puddle, they won't soak. I was soooo wrong. At least half of my class had some entertainment when I walked the room already late and dripping water. 

It's not the first (and diffinitelynot the last) time I had to cycle in a rain. However, in some magical way, I managed to avoid this kind of rain within last seven months. If I was already caught by rain, it was on a way home, where I could change my cloths, dry and stay warm. But today unfortunately I didn't have this luxuary to visit my home during a day and my bag was already freakin' have from carring Dutch language books. No place for dry cloths. My patience was put on a test and it has reached an apogee. Enough! I declare war to the Dutch weather!

The moment I came back home, I opened my laptop to find a perfect raincoat. Somehow the plastic baggy "coats" do not convince me. Maybe they are practical and usefull, but here it rains so often. I don't wanna look like a trash bag on a wind for most of the year. I checked my favorite online shops, allegro (something like polish eBay, but I found nothing but disappointment) and nothing... Suddenly I got it. Zalando! Not only I've seen so many commercials lately in Holland, the delivery is even for free! And it comes within few days. And yes, I found it! My perfect long (till my knees) raincoat with huge hood. Now the rain can go to hell! ;)

Greetings from Under-An-Umbrella

It's gonna be about the weather. And I'm gonna be complaining. What, I can! Especially that it drived me mad, when I see the weather forcast and 28 degrees in Poland, while here it's pathetic 16 degrees. Where's the spring, I'm asking? If not counting these two weeks before Easter plus Queensday, there's nothing to be happy about. It's a bit depressing, cause I heard that the summer in Holland is even worse and more rainy than the spring.

For the whole last month of my school I was so lucky to have a nice (or at least dry) weather in the mornings. But it couldn't last forever, otherwise it wouldn't be the dutch way :P Today, exactly in a middle of road to the university I was caught by rain. And since my jacket does not have a hood, by the time I reached the school, my mascara was gone. At least it was not on my eyelashes anymore. I had to fixmyself quickly,removing the black dots from my eyelid and I was happy I don't use much make-up. in this country it's useless. Doing the make-up and your hair is a complet waist of time. At least when your cycling. It's a bit comforting to see, I wasnot the only one who got wet. And of course it wasn't for the first time in genral. 

I wanted the Netherlands, so now I have. And I have to admit, that the weather here is very mean. I can get used to idea, that it's raining a lot, but why does it has to be so surprising? How many times did it start to rain just before my train arrived to the station I leave? Another thing, if I already know that I'm gonna get wet, let it rain for good and not stop just before I'd reach my destination/ house. Once I decided to wait. I was waiting, waiting and it didn't look like it's about to stop at all. So I jumped at my bike, got vet within few seconds and... it stoped before I rode 300 meters. Yesterday when we wanted to go to the gym with maurice, of course it started to rain. And stoped 2 minutes after we got there. That's just pure mean. 

To make the whole set with the rain, we also have a wind. It blows almost always. More or less but it blows. And always in the opposite direction that you're moving. Going th school, I went against the wind. On a way back (going the other directions) I was still against the wind. The fact that between these two trips was a 4-hour break doesn't matter. Even if it would be 15 minutes, the rule would still be the same. Against the wind. One of the characteristics of the dutch wind. Especially annoying when up the hill ;) 

Well... that was my complain. Now I feel better. So all of you people in Poland, enjoy your sunny may weather, cause it's gonna end soon. The cold air from above the Netherlands is coming! :D 

With the agenda in my hand

I don't really know how did that happen, but out of nowhere, suddenly I became quite busy. Comparing to my long, lazy days from last few months, now it's so different. I have to keep writting down everything in my little agenda and carry it with me everywhere and always. It's a little bit like a stereotypical Dutch, who cannot imagine his day without an agenda. On one hand it's a bit funny, on anothr a bit sad... i do understand that, they love planning and make an appointments (one of my first lessons in school was about "How to make an appointment"), but than I can't get it when I hear stories of my friends. Sometimes they have to call at least one day before and agree for having a coffee together with people that live in the same neighborhood! For me that's a bit too much. Luckly I don't have this problem with my friends. Maybe it's a matter of the generation?...

How did it happen, that I can't find much time anymore for my Big-Fat-Laziness? First of all, the school. Though I have only 3 lessons a week for fewhours each, I still have to study quite some at home and do the homework. Than, I make some extra money by cleaning and baking from time to time... And of course I couldn't imagine not spending time working on this blog, keeping our hen house clean and meeting friends. And working out 3 times a week! It doesn't seem much, but all together takes enough time, so I finally feel like I have something to do. 

Our moving to the new hen house is also coming soon. We had to finally start really planning "what", "when" and "how much". We keep dreaming and shering ideas, how we want the flat to look like, checking what else do we need. On Monday morning we're going to Goffert park, where many Dutch people follow the Queen's Day tradition and sell their stuff they don't need/want anymore. We're hoping we can find some nice, interesting items for the balcony and decoration. The only problem is, that you have to get there really early if you wanna find the best stuff. Some of the people open their "stalls" at 6.00 am! For us it's way too early, but we'll go and check anyway. Ahh, my first celebration of the Koninginnedag! I'll later post my experiences and observations. 

At the end, a little comedy show about the dutch holidays, Koninginnedag and selling the crap from their houses. One more time on this blog: Mr. John Fealey:

The ups and downs of the bicycle transportation

Again, it's gonna be about the bicycles. Couldn't be different in a counrty,when this way of transportation is so popular among all the citizens no matter there age. Even the prime minister here is going to work by bike. Everyone has a bicycle and so do I. And I have to admit, I really enjoy moving this way around the city. All there bicycle lanes, highways and parking places for bikes are literally everywhere... My enthusiasm is getting lower only when it's cold or raining (which I think anyone could find understandable).

Let's go back to the parking places. it's sounds a bit funny when you're talking about bikes. Well, they are everywhere. Usually black (or gray) metal construction holding the front wheel of your vehicle with a "knot" a bit higher, so you can (and even should) lock your bike with a chain. The best is a very big, thick chain with a huge padlock and electric shocker ;) just in case... After all we don't want anyone to borrow our precious bicycle without permission.

An ordinary bicycle "parking" in a city center. One of the smallest.

Securing your bike is one thing. Finding it back after few hours is a second thing. But unlocking it and pulling out of the "parking spot" is another thing! You find it funny/weird/exaggerating? For me it's just everyday life. You would think: "If she has parked her bike herself, locked it well, than how come can she has any problems finding it barely after 2-3 hours?" With this number of bicycles, while all of them look alike (as you can see on the picture above) it's actually easier than it might seem. I finally understand the owners of the bikes painted with bright colors, with flowers on a handlebars and all weird decorations. Now I know what where they thinking when they did that. They wanted to find their bike fast and easily. I happened to me already few times that I was walking there and back along the bike stand, trying to figure out where have I left it. Or find out with fury that my precious is not anymore in the place I left it. And than after few minutes thinking and looking around realizing that it is still there... it's just me standing in a wrong aisle at the parking.

Ok... so we've found our bike.  Now, how to get it back? We're unlocking the chain, unblocking the wheels, pull and... nothing. The bike is standing still. Right... the handlebars got stuck between the handbreaks of another bike. Almost like the deers during the rut. There's not much space there, so the operation "unblocking on the left witout blocking yourself on the right at the same time" needs logistic skills. We did it! but the bike in not moving still. Of course... the pedal of the other bike got between the spokes of our bike. Another difficult process of jerking it out. Finally after few more minutes we pulled the bike out. Meantime people passing u by were watching, how you're struggling with the bike, probably wondering if you're trying to steal it or not. Whatever, our single-track wheeler is free and ready to go :) Till the next stop, where the situations is gonna start all over again. 

Peanuts and popcorn

Weekend for us usually means relaxing, planning and socializing. This one was no different. We were sleeping till late, looking for a perfect equipment for our new hen house, where we're moving in in a month and of course going out in the evening.

It's been already a long time, since we've been in a cinema. They are playing lately few movies, that are not very ambitious, but filled with action and special effect, so we decided to watch some... "Wrath of the Titans". A lot of mythical creatures, elements of the greek mythology, loads of special effects in 3D... that was our choice. After all, who said that watching only serious movies with deep message is right. Cheap entertainment is good as well from time to time :) Before the movie always the same dilemma: sweet or salty popcorn? And later, during the break... yes, in Holland they do make breaks in a middle of the movies: smokers are happy, the ones who've drunk a lot of coke as well and me... I'm a bit irritated. So during the break, Maurice's big surprisement, when I ask him "Take this empty box and throw it away!". Why would be anyone bothered with such a nonsense like leaving trashes in a cinema? The staff is gonna clean here after the movie anyway! After all, that's what they are paying them for. At least that's how it looks according to the Dutch. In polish cinemas, though the staff is also cleaning the movie theater, I always try to leave my seat tidy when I leave. A matter of a personal culture I guess (or in this sense, rather national culture). What do I know...

But than, it was just a beginning. After the movie we met with our friends in a very popular pub, Samson. The place that almost every citizen of Nijmegen knows. I wanned to visit it since the holiday, when I was not even living in the Netherlands yet, but somehow I couldn't manage. Everytime I was passing by, no matter if it was a day or night, summer, autumn or winter, there were always people sitting inside the bar, but also outside. Quite a lot of people. Since I'm a very shy and timid  creature by nature, the crowd was always overawed me. But that was the day! The day I finally crossed the door of the legendary Cafe Samson! 

The first thing I've noticed was a big mess on the floor around the tables. I couldn't figure out what was that small, light white-beige junk there. I pre-ignored it. Luckly we found a free, big table for all of us, we ordered the beer (each of us took a different brand) and a friend brought a bowl of peanuts in shells. Now suddenly I realized what was going on, while I was watching my companions how they remove the shells of peanuts and... let them fall on a floor. And it was perfectly fine for them. Making such a mess in a bar. I was astonished with that view. Couldn't believe that the staff is looking what they're doing and not making a single remark. Not even being annoyed with the behavior of the messy customers! In Poland if you'd try something like that, someone would immidiately lynch (at least would give you an evil look). It was loads of the peanut shells in the whole pub. Next to the bar there was a huge basket filled with peanuts and bowls, so anyone could take as much as he'she wants anytime. Just a local tradition of the place. Apparently everyone knows it. I'm still a bit shocked, because till now I found Holland as quite a neat and well organised country...

First day of school

Yesterday I felt like a 7-year-old. It was my first day of school! I could finally start my Inburgering. I woke up early (at least early for me) in the morning, packed a notebook, pen and a sandwich in my bag, put a scarf around my neck (the weather was not very springish) and ran downstairs to get my bike.
- You're gonna be like a real Dutch student now... going to school on a bicycle! - Maurice was so happy and proud of his "freshman".

It took me more less 20 minutes to get to the university. Except one hill with bumps set literally every 100 meters, the whole route was pleasant. From the city to the school, along the railway tracks leads a long bicycle lane sometimes called The Bibycle Highway. During a day it's quite calm and empty, but in the morning between 8 and 9, the traffic really reminds of a highway. Tens of (mostly) students follow in a direction of the Radboud University. Everyone's going focused, smoothly in quiet. Like fishes floating downstream. And somewhere there in the middle, me. Bravely cycling and feeling, that I'm a part of it. Very cool feeling, with a spark of something extraordinary. But why? Why am actually so happy about? Cause I'm going to school surrounded with  the Dutch people? What's so special about it? It sounds so normal. And it is normal... finally! I'm an ordinary part of the society. Seemingly ordinary ;)

I came much earlier, but there were already two people sitting in a classroom. Very sympathetic Japanese girl and Afghan guy. We started to talk, asking who came from where and making sure their Dutch also really sucks. After all it's a biginners class. Meantime another people started coming and joining our conversation. Before the lesson started we already knew who's from what coountry and how long has been already living in Holland. Together it was twelve people, all from different parts of the world. None of the countries did duplicate except of Poland and China. You could expect these two nations... after all, it's always full of Chinese everywhere, same as Poles in the Windmill-land. 

We started with officially introducing ourselves in front of the class and shake a welcome hand with our teacher. Those who didn't have the books yet (like me of course) went to the secretariat, put their signature and received three heavy handbooks and an even bigger binder with school's logo. Well, with this kind of equipment you can really feel like a student again! 

The lesson was fun. I could quietly laze, because the basics we were learning about, I have already done myself  many times at home. I didn't even have to strain with the answers for any questions. I just let other people to try and show off. Now it sounds like I'm so immodest, but why should I pretand... I just know these things already. We'll wait and see. When we come to the point where there's something new for me or issues I have problems with, than I'm gonna start working hard. Till now it's memorizing well.

 All of it was nice and fun. The group is very sympathetic and I already started liking them. The teacher is also fine. There's only one tiny details messing the whole picture. The books... I was clearly not prepared for their size. And not only me. They didn't want to fit my bag (after all not very big one) in any way. And of course I left the backseat clasps at home. And what now? How am I supposed to go back home? Holding the books under one arm and the other hand on on a bicycle? I wouldn't dare... my cycling skills are not that good yet. Especially not up the hill. After few minutes struggling with my bag, I took my stuff out, pushed the books inside and tried to cram my wallet and sandwich on the sides. Now I could go! With the bag wide open and the books sticking out of it and covering half of my back. Whatever, it did work! On a way I've lost my sandwich crossing one of the bumps, so I had to stop and go back for it. Luckly I wrapped it well in a morning in a plastic bag. Otherwise the bump would deprive me my lunch and it was a long day waiting.