- Is
everything ok? Why are you not answering your phone? - Maurice asks a bit
worried.
- I’m
sorry, I was just cycling when you called. I cannot use this phone when I’m
wearing hand gloves [ah, the downside of a smartphone]. Plus I was already very
close from home. I thought I’ll call you back.
- You
were just coming back home? Why so late… I thought you were supposed to meet
with girls for lunch at 13.00? - he sounds surprised
- Well I
did… It just took a bit longer. You know we always tend to gossip for long. And
we haven’t seen each other for sooo long!
The WastefulWives Club is reunited! God I love these lunch meetings. They always take the
whole afternoon, we often discover new, cute places in our city and we can
gossip nonstop for few hours and share stories called “I’m never gonna understand
these Dutch…[honestly, who can??]”. It’s still nothing comparing to going for
lunch with my friend Lidia (we always somehow ended up at some bar drinking
vodka on the rocks somewhat after midnight), but these were different times.
Student times. Now the Wasteful Wives have husbands/children/cats to feed. Nevertheless,
when we meet, for these few hours nothing else matters.
We all
know, that a woman need her girlfriends same as she needs an oxygen. Love is
great, carrier’s amazing, motherhood… well, apparently some people enjoy it ;) You
can have it all, but at some point this day is going to come, when you’re gonna
want to kill everyone around you. And at this day only a good, honest girl-talk
can save you. Especially if you live abroad.
If
someone would ask me how do I remember my first months as an expat, I would
say: long. Sure everything was new and fresh and fascinating (or terrifying).
There was a lot to discover, a lot to learn and accept. But those days were
quite lonely. Maurice was working a lot and coming home late (well he still is,
but now I’m also busy). Me on the other hand… I was trying so much to fill my
days with anything. I was desperately needing a friend. Someone like me, who
has moved here and had similar hopes, worries and emotions as I did. When I
finally met my Expat girls I was relived. Than at school I met more girls, who
became my best friends in this country. I could finally feel like home. I had
someone to go out for coffee, to meet. Someone who knew exactly what it feels
like to move abroad for love.
Human is
a herding animal and he needs to feel he belongs somewhere. Women need it even
more. Being an immigrant who doesn’t speak the language yet kind of makes you
stand out from the rest of the society. You can try to integrate 24/7 and you’re still gonna be different. And you’re
gonna have these thought like “Why are they being so weird? Is this nation
sane? Or… am I still sane?”. This is when your friends step in. A lost and
confused girl can exchange their observations, compare the analyses and draw
conclusions together: she’s not the only one that’s crazy. There’s more of us –
the incoming paranoids or it’s the Dutch nation that’s not exactly normal ;) And
there are hundreds of such a social
scientific topics to discuss: the Dutch savoir-vivre, struggling with learning
the language and “the hate stage”, the healthcare system, the laid-back fashion
and style (and why it’s pointless to even style your hair), relations with your
in-laws (and why even if they are awesome, you don’t want to spend with them
significantly more time than hanging on a phone or skype with your mom)… These
conversations help you to feel that you really belong somewhere and realise
that you’re not alone with these confusing feelings and ambivalent emotions.
And if there’s more people like you, it means your mental health is still fine.
So live long girlfriends and the relaxing time spent with them!
Brak komentarzy:
Prześlij komentarz